I was born into a strict, conservative family and conveniently, my father works as a police officer (not the highest rank of cops, but among the little ones) in the narcotic department. So, words like cannabis, heroin and ICE were words I have been listening to since I was in primary school. Not that I knew what they meant, though. When I was little, like 10 or 11 years old, I had a fear. Fear of getting involved in drugs and being locked up under my father's supervision with my father's colleagues talking up my father's sleeves on how bad his child is. I didn't want my father to be embarrassed of me, so naturally, I fought my way away from drugs until I finished high school.
Being encased in a tiny town all the while, I first saw the real world when I entered matriculation. Drugs, cigarettes, alcohol were just theories to me before matriculation and out there, without my parents, I saw what people did. People of my age, people of my gender doing things I have never even imagined, I was really taken aback. I still remember, when I was in matriculation, my boyfriend sneaked out to a billiard club to watch football and I was so scared that he probably would be doing drugs or alcohol then, because drugs are taken by bad people, because alcohol makes you hit your family members, because ecstasy is going to make you cheat on your spouse. Those were my views on drugs and alcohol. Or better put, those were the views instilled by the government, Tamil movies and partly, my papa on drugs and alcohol upon me.
Five years in medical school, my opinions changed. Well, doctors deal with drugs and that, changed my perspectives about drugs and also, I began to see people who don't cheat on their girlfriends when they are under influence, so that kind of corrected bits and pieces of my cognitive errors. There was a day when I was fortunate enough to be posted to Hospital Sungai Buloh, center for Infectious Disease in Malaysia. I met the head of department(HOD) of the Infectious Disease Department, and I still remember the question he asked us, the lot of medical students there. If someone ends up doing drugs, or getting HIV due to sharing needles, who is to be blamed? Well, naturally, being medical students in public university in Malaysia, the answer everyone offered was,"Serves you right you filthy drug addict! Now, get high with your AIDS lah!" So, the blame was on the addict. That was when the HOD, satisfied with our answers as if that's what he's been dying to hear, said, "Did you ever design your parents when you were in womb and wished that they would be like this and like that?" So, the point he was trying to convey was, not everybody has the pleasure of being born to a narcotic police officer who was able to freak me out to not try drugs and constantly reminded me the importance of education. Some of us are born into circumstances where spouses have arguments and fights, money was never enough, no one cared about school grades and people around them were all drunkards, that they have no options but to indulge in drugs and other unhealthy activities. When the HOD implanted this idea to us,to me, I stopped stereotyping.
Now, my friends use drugs for recreation and in wards, I have talked to many drug addicts and people who are recovering from substance dependence, and I think it is okay if you take drugs or alcohol. I myself have tried alcohol, many times now and I am looking forward to the day when I can get a taste of E or some morphine, just to feed my curiosity. I am uptight, I don't like the prospect of seeing myself lose control, so I would probably try them when I am alone or when I am with my boyfriend.
So, I think, yeah, those are my views on drugs and alcohol.
Post-script
1. My advice to you. Don't get addicted and use your own needles. Do not share needles, ok?
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